Monday, May 3, 2010

I don't know! lol

So many thoughts and emotions are running through me. I feel like I need to be running and I don't even know where to go. Our lives have been so busy these past few months. Cody turned 8 on March 26th! Austin turns 2 on May 5th! Eric and Dad went back to work this in April. It was a good thing financially, but, lemme tell ya I miss that man! I have yet to get back into a groove. Homeschooling is the only thing I feel like I'm accomplishing and I'm barely able to get that done! Cody hasn't been cooperating here lately and I don't know if it's his ADHD or the warmer weather or what! He isn't listening and he's whining about every lesson which is not like him. He'll have his last Math class on Wednesday and we're done with Art and Music (thank God, cause those were the worst subjects EVER!). He has about 8 history classes left and maybe 10 English and 10 science! We're wrapping up the year. I swear this week though he has forgotten EVERYTHING I have ever taught him! It's driving me nuts. We're also struggling at bedtime. He has a doctor appointment on Friday, so, we'll see what he says and go from there.

Cody decided this year that he wanted to play ball. So we're doing that. He has roughly 2 games per week and they are either at 5:30 or 7:00 which is aggravating and schedule wrecking. If it's the 5:30 games we don't eat supper until late. If it's the 7:00 game it's messing up bedtime/bathtime routines! It's driving me nuts already and we've only had 3 games! It doesn't look like we're going to do well either! I somehow ended up as dugout Mom and that's nervewracking too! I was told last week that I pretty much suck at it. Thanks! I can't help that I don't feel comfortable yelling at other peoples children and that I have a toddler who desperately wants to play ball. Austin attempts (succeeds mostly) at running onto the field during every game! Mom is keeping the book, so, she can't help out as much and Eric and Dad are lucky to get to show up at all! I will say this though, tonights game, wasn't too bad! Austin pretty much did what he was told. He only succeeded onto the field 1 time and ran off to the basketball court 1 time as well. This is an improvement.

Construction on the dining room is still in force, it's just not going fast, with the boys back to work and all. I'm pretty sure we have a paint color picked out and the rest is already bought just needs finished up. It would probably have gone smoother if Eric would have helped Dad drywall.

I don't have a career. I feel like I have no special talents and I don't know what to do with myself. At some point, I want to have a career I just don't know what I want to be when I grow up. Since the age of 5 I have said that I want to be a teacher. After working in a school district as a paraprofessional there is no way that I want this career anymore. I want to do so many things and the things I want to do can't be rolled into one or two degrees! I wouldn't mind journalism, cosmetology, paralegal, secretary, and the list goes on and on. One of the problems is that there isn't (or doesn't seem to be) a high demand for most of these professions around us. If I said I wanted to be Amish I'm sure that I could accomplish that as there are an abundance of them in our area lol. Everyone I know seems to be a nurse and frankly I don't have the desire to do that. It seems like that's all there is around here, nurse, factory work, cosmetology, fast food, and retail. I just don't have a clue what I want to be. lol

Other than that everything is fine. There I'm done whining for awhile. My violin is still playing for myself and my pity party, but, I'm done putting it online (for now lol).