Sunday, January 18, 2015

Haven't blogged in a loooong time!  So much stuff has happened that I don't even know where to begin.  I am trying to think of what happened first.  I joined the local squad department I guess would be first.  Joining wasn't supposed to be this big of a deal.  Or so I thought.  But it was.  It was a great idea in the beginning. Then the classes started.  It was definitely more in depth than I thought it was going to be.  But I enjoyed it.  I went to all but one class (I had a kidney stone and was in surgery).  I passed CPR and it was time for my observation runs!  I was so excited to finally be able to tag along.  It was fun, lots of adrenaline, and I fell in love.  I was the first one in my class to complete my observation runs.  Next was class final, practicals, and then the National Registry.  I was pumped.  In the middle of all of this going on, I got a divorce.  It was not dramatic and was for the most part non-eventful.  My ex-husband and I remain friends.  I passed my practicals and I failed my first attempt at the National Registry.  I took a break, studied for 3 months, and took a shot at it again.  I passed!  I'm now a volunteer EMT and I love every minute of it.  I'm listening to a run with my department as we speak and truthfully a little disappointed I wasn't on duty right now.  HAHA.

The divorce.  The divorce happened for a culmination of reasons but it turned out to be a really good thing for us.  Eric and I are friends.  The kids are happy for the most part.  We're able to go to sporting events and sit with each other and also talk like friends.  There are times where we get annoyed with each other but we always seem to talk it out or let it go. We promised each other we would remain friends and I'm happy to report we have done just that.  Do people understand our relationship???  NO!  They don't but we don't really care.  I think some people think he should be mad at me for the divorce.  And I think those same people are intimidated by it.  Most people say we are weird.  That's probably an accurate description.  But we put the kids first and that's all that matters.  We've been divorced a little over a year now and we both seem to be doing fine.

The dating.  Oh my goodness!!!!  Dating sucks!  Maybe it's because truly I didn't ever do it before.  I was married and pregnant at 19 and didn't really date around much.  But I swear it sucks!!!  It's hard for me to not be in a relationship.  Eric and I have both dated a few people and for the most part it was fine.  There are a lot of liars out there and I'm very naive.  But I'm working on it.  I went on a date Friday and I had a good time.

The future.  I have some big plans for the future.  I'm going to return to school and get my RN.  It's a two year process.  But in the end it will be worth it.  I'll be able to provide for myself and the boys on my own and never have depend on anyone else.  I've become a little more independent but I want more. I demand more and I will achieve more.  Hopefully in the process I will find someone that will ride along but if I don't I'll be okay.  And it took a long time for me to realize that.